View Full Version : Parkinson's

09-06-2012, 10:38 PM
Hi everyone. We are feeling rather shell shocked we have been told my partner most likely has Parkinson's ( to be diagnosed privately next week). We can see he has all the symptoms....
Seems so unfair as he's only early 60s and I've just finished caring for my
Mum who died two months ago...
Also wondering how it'll impact on my five day a week c m business.
Anyone got any knowledge of this cruel disease? He's gone downhill so fast affecting even his voice and is tired and feels like he has flu and has to rest almost all day.
Still in shock really and feel terribly tired from it all ( plus doing all the housework and cooking now as well as having between three to six mindees every day ... (He is my assistant )
Should I tell parents?
I can't see the way forward any more.

Luckily he adores our new puppy who lies with him a lot :)

10-06-2012, 02:05 AM
I don't have much knowledge but just wanted to send hugs.
:group hug:
Must be a big shock for you both especially as he's so young

Do you think you will have to cut down work as you need to make sure you look after yourself as well as looking after everyone else. Make sure you don't overdo things and make yourself ill and make sure he gets the rest he needs.

10-06-2012, 05:20 AM
I'm so sorry to hear this, what a shock. There are drugs that can help. W ait and see what the Dr says next wee
Sending you both hugs.
X x x

10-06-2012, 06:59 AM
Very sorry to hear this:group hug:

My Aunt has it, she was diognosed about 3-4yrs ago. Her's seems to be very well controlled by the medication shes on, the only thing to have become noticably worse is she has abit of stiffness in her neck but tbh we are all amazed at how well she is! We all thought the worst but it hasn't been nearly at all like we thought it would be!

I know you are prob just thinking of your husband but please take care of yourself too. :group hug:

10-06-2012, 07:02 AM
Thank you for your hugs. I am surprised how much this has taken the wind out of me. I feel distracted and distant when child minding and am not engaging too well. Hopefully it'll return as I loved it before. I even wondered this week if I'm going off it!

Do you think I should tell the parents? I still need him for my numbers but realise eventually I'll have to look for another.... Do the parents have to know tho? Tbh if anyone had any knowledge of the condition they would recognise the signs.

Woken up today and still feel like I've driven into a brick wall.

blue bear
10-06-2012, 07:20 AM
You are going to have to tell ofsted, ask them your obligation to inform parents. It will really depend on how he is to when /if you need to cut back.
I've no knowledge of parkinsons, remember yourself in all this. Hugs x.

10-06-2012, 07:25 AM
Thanks yes of course I'll ring them after the official diagnosis. Already decided to try and free up Wednesday's from next term so we can go to a local support group.
I have heard the drugs can be really effective so fingers crossed.

sue m
10-06-2012, 07:43 AM

I'm so sorry to hear your news jadavi. I have a friend who has Parkinson's, she's had it for many years now and has a lot of support from her doctor and has been on drugs to help her for many years too.

I felt the same as you a few years ago, like I'd driven into a brick wall. My husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at 52. He hadn't been right since he was about 50. I gave up work to be his carer when he got really ill and then moved areas and re-registered 6 years later.

Parkinson's is different of course, when he gets the correct drugs, hopefully they will help him a lot.

Hugs from me too and hope you get the support you need from your doctor and a local Parkinson's support group.


Chimps Childminding
10-06-2012, 08:12 AM
Hugs to you both!!! I would wait until you have seen the doctor before making too many decisions. See what they have to say and what help/medication is available. Once you are armed with all the facts you will then have a clearer picture of what to say to parents.

As others have said remember to look after YOURSELF too!

Hope you get better news than you are expecting this week!

10-06-2012, 08:37 AM
so sorry to hear this :group hug:

Modern medication for Parkinsons can make huge difference to quality of life with this condition. Not that I have first hand experience, but have nursed many patients with the condition over the years (although not recently). The shock to you will impact on how you feel about your business, so you just need to take each day as it comes and if financially possible maybe cut down (not easy I know :() My hubby had an operation a couple of years ago that was suposed to be overnight stay hospital and turned into 10 days and then alot longer to recover at home. This impacted on me big time and really made me think about the future and what would happens if one of us was to fall again or like you faced with a long term illness.

My advice would be, wait to you have diagnosis and then inform Ofsted. personally I wouldn't inform parents just yet if you feel you are coping with your numbers. Is there anyone that could step in and help you out for a while? CRB's can be very quick these days for assistants and Ofsted will allow assistants to work whilst waiting for CRB's, providing they are not left alone with the children.

My thoughts will be with you this week. x

10-06-2012, 08:59 AM
I am so sorry to hear about your husband. It is a scary diagnosis but one which can be controlled with drugs to a large extent so take all the advice and help you can from the doc.

When you ring Ofsted they might want an independent medical assessment and may take him off your certificate fairly quickly if they consider he can't look after children any more so be prepared for that.

I wouldn't say anything to parents just yet but once Ofsted get involved things might move fast and you may have to lose a child or 2 if you need him for your numbers - so I'd be looking out for a new assistant if I were you.

Sending big hugs xx

10-06-2012, 10:25 AM
So sorry to hear about your husband, must be a terrible shock for you both.

I don't know much about the condition to be honest, although a close neighbour was diagnosed a year ago (early 40's and I think he said it was 3rd stage). He is doing much better now they've sorted his meds out.

With regard to parents, if you don't want them to know about his condition, as it's not you that's poorly I don't see that they need to know to be honest. You are allowed a private life too, and especially whilst you're trying to wrap your own head around it.
Getting another assistant at this stage is probably a good idea, maybe one or two days a week, as it can give hubby a break and will get the children used to a different face gradually

Should you need to give notice you can just say 'due to a change in personal circumstances' If they try try and push you, just tell them it's a personal family matter and you don't wish to discuss it outside the family.

Sending :group hug: