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samkeddy
10-05-2012, 07:01 AM
Just wondered when mum comes to collect and asks nicely 'has she been good?' and their little angel has actually been a mardy, naughty brat(sorry) all day, what do you say??

Dont want to sound negative too often, but dont want to be dishonest??

Thanks in advance x

miffy
10-05-2012, 07:08 AM
I perhaps wouldn't say mardy, naughty brat :laughing:

If I have to say something negative then I try to find something positive to say too, although I admit it's not always easy!

Miffy xx

The Juggler
10-05-2012, 07:11 AM
Just wondered when mum comes to collect and asks nicely 'has she been good?' and their little angel has actually been a mardy, naughty brat(sorry) all day, what do you say??

Dont want to sound negative too often, but dont want to be dishonest??

Thanks in advance x

'she's been a bit cross with the world today'
'she's not been her normal happy self'
'was easily upset today'

I've a few more up my sleeve but can't think of any right now :laughing:

VeggieSausage
10-05-2012, 07:11 AM
you could say we've had a good day although lo has been a little feisty....

Kiddleywinks
10-05-2012, 07:11 AM
Was a bit challenging earlier, but brightened up when we.....

Was being decisive until such and such happened

Wasn't too happy earlier but did come round after.......

For my own kids I use: was trying to assert his/her authority until he/she realised they don't have any :laughing::laughing:;)

samkeddy
10-05-2012, 07:15 AM
lol, these are all the kinds of things i say lol, i do put it nicely and always TRY to say something nice.

but do you always mention bad behaviour especially when it becomes so repetative??

madmamma
10-05-2012, 07:36 AM
It depends, sometimes on the parent, other times on the child.

If it's the child's nature to be challenging, then I don't feel parents would believe me downplaying things, and it wouldn't be a true reflection of their time with me should I need to mention it in greater detail at a later stage

If it's unusual behaviour for a particular child, then I'd definitely be mentioning it after a day or two, we all have off days, but in a way that's sensitive, to see if something's happened that I'm not aware of

Demonjill
10-05-2012, 07:41 AM
Depends on parent and child

I usually do say something as sometimes if the child hears me telling the parent as they are not keen on their parent knowing and perhaps being a bit disappointed in their behaviour works for some anyway - other kids dont care though

I sometimes put more detail in their daily contact book and refer them to that for more detail and to contact me if they need to ask anything. That way ive also got a record of it and can refer back to see if their is a pattern to any behaviour etc:thumbsup:

The Juggler
10-05-2012, 08:32 AM
lol, these are all the kinds of things i say lol, i do put it nicely and always TRY to say something nice.

but do you always mention bad behaviour especially when it becomes so repetative??

if there are ongoing issues I would call parent in for a chat and say x or x is becoming an issue or LO is getting in a habit of xxxx. Let's have a plan to work on it together shall we.

Then to avoid negativity at pick up, just tell parent about how well LO has done today so 'x has done well today, I only had to remind her a few times about ..... the rest of the day has been fab.' or just tell the positives :thumbsup:

dette
10-05-2012, 09:32 AM
I had a LO 3yr who was a scratcher and my son used to look like he'd been mauled by a tiger !! parents worked shifts so it was one week mam collecting and dad dropping off then vice versa next week .dad apparenly would go ape on LO when they got home if i told him that she was hurting my LO who was only 18mth so mam asked if i could stop telling him and just tell her the next day which i did but when my son got a little older and had taken more than enough scratching he turned on her and nipped her face leaving a scratch.Obviously i told dad and put it in the book.Next day little princess who dad thinks can do no wrong now came in and said "if O scratches me again my dad said i have to punch him in the face !!!!" needless to say i had dad in that night and told him if his child EVER punches my child in the face i would hold him personally responsible and terminate contract immediatly !!!! so now i tell both parents if their child is a ratbag but i always tell them when they are lovely too

Bananabrain
10-05-2012, 11:15 AM
I find myself saying 'she has had one of her tricky days'
The truth is she has been absolutely awful, screaming, snatching, being mean, refusing to eat, clamouring for my attention all day:laughing:
I really must learn to 'man up'
I figure that parents don't want to hear lots of negatives at the end of a hard day, so I try and make it as positive as possible.
Most of the time:laughing:

samkeddy
10-05-2012, 11:50 AM
I had a LO 3yr who was a scratcher and my son used to look like he'd been mauled by a tiger !! parents worked shifts so it was one week mam collecting and dad dropping off then vice versa next week .dad apparenly would go ape on LO when they got home if i told him that she was hurting my LO who was only 18mth so mam asked if i could stop telling him and just tell her the next day which i did but when my son got a little older and had taken more than enough scratching he turned on her and nipped her face leaving a scratch.Obviously i told dad and put it in the book.Next day little princess who dad thinks can do no wrong now came in and said "if O scratches me again my dad said i have to punch him in the face !!!!" needless to say i had dad in that night and told him if his child EVER punches my child in the face i would hold him personally responsible and terminate contract immediatly !!!! so now i tell both parents if their child is a ratbag but i always tell them when they are lovely too

God thats awful!!! if a parent told any kid to punch one of mine id be furious!!!

ye i fiqure often parents know what their children are like so dont need to hear all the bad stuff, but also no point pretending their all good as gold as when something escalates it will be harder to explain to parents iyswim

Helen Dempster
10-05-2012, 02:03 PM
Was a bit challenging earlier, but brightened up when we.....

Was being decisive until such and such happened

Wasn't too happy earlier but did come round after.......

For my own kids I use: was trying to assert his/her authority until he/she realised they don't have any :laughing::laughing:;)

this had me in stitches, nearly choked on my cuppa!

Kiddleywinks
10-05-2012, 02:22 PM
[/B]

this had me in stitches, nearly choked on my cuppa!

Oooopsy :laughing::laughing:
'tis true though, nothing worse than a 2 year old know it all, oh yes, sorry there is.... a 15 year old know it all :rolleyes:

We should make a translation book, maybe call it 'Being PC v The truth' or 'Lets read between the lines'

Decisive = Stubborn
Asserting authority = Being bossy
Very vocal = screamed from the minute you left
Indecisive = emptied all the toys out and still didn't want to play

melco
10-05-2012, 04:12 PM
When my mindee was picked up last week he told his mum with a big grin on his face "I have been very naughty today". To be honest he hadn't been that bad but his Mum had told me to use the step if he misbehaves as he has been very naughty recently, I felt very guilty using the step and then felt worse having to explain what he had done!!

She seemed happy with my reasons but I did look very red faced when I only just opened the door and he blurted it out and pointed to the bottom of the stairs and said "thats my step"!!!

The way I see it is that he has not been with me that long and that he plays up shows that he feels comfortable in my home and his mum did not have a problem and I did like they said above, I told her what he did but that he did apologise and gave me a cuddle afterwards so all was forgiven!

fluff1975
10-05-2012, 08:58 PM
I tend to be honest but use the 's**t sandwich' approach. Good news. Bad news. Good news. Seems to work!

samkeddy
11-05-2012, 09:27 AM
I tend to be honest but use the 's**t sandwich' approach. Good news. Bad news. Good news. Seems to work!

lol! ah so thats what its called??:laughing:

madmamma
11-05-2012, 09:31 AM
I tend to be honest but use the 's**t sandwich' approach. Good news. Bad news. Good news. Seems to work!

LSMIWM

(laughed so much I wet myself)

nokidshere
11-05-2012, 09:58 AM
I dont really have any problems with the older children so its not and issue - with my 2 year old I tell his mum "he has been just fine - he only had x meltdowns today" :)

kellib
11-05-2012, 10:07 AM
I usually say 'oh he's been a bit out of sorts today' when I really mean he's screamed every time someone has even looked at him!

Mum knows what LO is like though so isn't bothered by anything I say, sometimes I say 'it's been a good day, we've only had 10 tantrums' :laughing: